Pampas and Pearls

“Every time I thought I was being rejected from something good, I was actually being re-directed to something better.” – Dr. Steve Maraboli I have been trying to find a new job for some time now but I’ve not been getting any luck, one of the words I see the most when applying for jobs is “unfortunately”. That word alone is so powerful that it makes me feel worthless and as if I can never amount to anything. It’s been a difficult journey and seeing that word puts me down continuously. It has gotten to the point that whenever I do apply for a job I’m expecting the word “unfortunately” and even though I expect it, it still kills me and makes me spiral. However, I’m sick of going through this rut so here are some ways I deal with rejection. 1. Accepting: The first easiest thing to do is distract myself and escape the real world for a little while, whether that be watching a film, gaming or even reading a book. Being put in the shoes of a character momentarily takes away my problems and fe...

Are you in a rut? Here are some tips to pick yourself back up.  “Self-care is not self-indulgence, it is -self-preservation.” – Audre Lorde   Life can be hard when you’re feeling down. Sometimes I just want to stay in bed and binge watch my favourite shows but I know it’s not always healthy. Here are some ways I bring myself back up.   1. Shopping : Retail therapy is always fun! You can do this alone, online or even with friends. Making a day out of shopping can help you feel excited about all the new purchases. Personally, shopping makes me want to work harder so that I can treat myself.   2. Exercise : That can be going for a walk and observing nature, dancing or lifting weights. Exercising releases endorphins which also makes one feel more positive. I know I’m always more energetic and excited after a good workout. It makes me feel ready to move towards my goals!  3. Meeting friends and family : Positive people around you can make you feel ...

 "Only you can control your future" Dr. Seuss In my post last Tuesday I updated you all about my anxiety journey and how I have progressed even with my recent relapses. In this post I'm going to tell you about the steps I try an use to control and manage that anxiety. Everyone is different so these are not steps that will suit everyone but they are definitely a place to start,  so here goes.  If you get anxious about the unknown that is perfectly normal, it happens to everyone. A thing that I find helps me is finding an element of the day you can control. It could be something small like  the time you leave the house. It could be the food you are going to eat or the clothes you're going to wear. while they might sound small and insignificant they will help you take back some element of control.  It might also help looking up any new place you are going to visit and get a feel for the day.   This will help you feel in control. If it's a event ask someon...

 "No need to hurry. No need to sparkle. No need to be anyone but oneself"  -Virginia Woolf There is no right way to begin this story and that's okay. I have told my story before but I feel now is the right time to re-share and update my story, hopefully it will help someone else out there either with anxiety or help someone understand anxiety a little more.  I have suffered with anxiety since I was bullied in primary school by my teacher no less. She terrified every class she had and mine was no exception. My anxiety got to bad I would make myself sick to avoid going to school or I would pace the floor while rubbing my hands together.  One time I sat in the head teachers Office too scared to go to class because I didn't understand the homework and was petrified of being told him. Almost every morning before school I was sick and refused to leave my parents side, keep in mind I was 8-9 years old. It continued throughout primary school especially when it came to SATs i...

"There is no limit to what we, as women, can accomplish"  - Michelle Obama Why I think it is important, now that is a question I have been asking myself a lot lately. Women have achieved a lot over history from the right to vote in 1928 to even right now where women are demanding a voice of the change in law with regards to abortion in varying part of the world. I take being a woman as a symbol of power, a symbol of strength and a symbol of unity.  I love being a woman and I wouldn't change it for the world.  There are many women who inspire me, mostly from modern day but a few from History. Emma Watson inspires me for speaking up in the UN. Adele inspires me for not changing who she is to her very core. Demi Lovato inspires me for trying be to her authentic self. Our late Queen inspired me with her keep carrying on attitude, even when times were tough. Ada Lovelace inspires me with her passion and determination to achieve in times where women scarcely did. Mary Shelley i...

"How lucky am I to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard" - Winnie the Pooh   Before I begin, I just want everyone to know not everything works for everyone, we are all different and cope with grief differently. This is what works best for me and what I have researched. Grief is not always something I deal with well; I am sure it is not something any of us deal with well. Expressing myself is difficult and I prefer to keep it to myself (which is something I am working on for 2023) and then eventually it all boils to the surface, so here are some things I will be trying to use to help with dealing with grief: Number 1: Accept that it has happened. This is the first one and most difficult one, it has happened and unfortunately nothing, and I mean nothing, with change it. This takes the longest the do and processing it is the toughest challenge of all. Number 2: Create a memory book. This can have photos, cards, clothing, any form of memories. Sometimes havi...

“Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.” — Albus Dumbledore from Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban The quote above really resonates with me at the moment, I am making a change in my life to bring the light back in. I am moving away from a career I have wanted since I was 11 but now at 26 it isn't the path for me and it isn't where I want to be. I am coming to terms with that and trying at show myself that it is okay. I stopped my current path as my anxiety was taking over, I could not breathe properly and felt like I could not leave the house. After taking some time away from my course I came to the realisation that I no longer had the desire to follow my current path of teaching. This upset me more than the change itself. The decade long journey comes to an end and I have not much of a clue on where to go next. I am currently taking it day by day and being kind to myself. There is no one to blame, no negative fe...

 Hello everyone and Happy New Year! It's 2023 and I'm making it the year I put myself first. With this new found self care I have taken the decision to change and evolve with my career. I am moving towards my love for writing and photography and being creative. A scary move into the somewhat unknown, to rephrase frozen. I am taking a giant leap away from what I thought was going to be my future but as the word evolves and as I grow up things change. I am currently learning to accept this and say it's okay to not know, but also to say 'you've got this' Taking care of yourself can be seen as selfish but it necessary for good mental health and living a life you want to live. This will be a huge topic for me going forward and for Pampas and Pearls in general.  There are lots of exciting things to come and I cannot wait for you to join me on my journey. Come and say hi, give us a follow. You won't regret it.  The posting schedule will be every Sunday at 10.00am w...